A new sock startup has the big running sock manufacturers running scared! eRunningSocks.com is dragging the ancient sport of running out of the Stone Age by combining proprietary nanotechnology and NASA-developed “moon fabric” to create the world’s most perfect sock.
eRunningSocks.com founder Chase M. Down started with the simple idea of integrating all our tech “wearables” into what most runners already have to wear anyway. As the former Cal Tech Adjunct Professor of Applied Nano Structures and Supramolecular Assemblies tells it, he was out for his morning jog before heading into the lab, when he stopped in his tracks:
“I had an epiphany! I was wearing a GPS watch on my wrist, my cell phone strapped to my arm, compression socks, compression sleeves and compression underpants, and my thermoregulator in my shorts…and in spite of all this stuff, running fast is still not super easy? That’s not right! Right then and there, I put all of my passion, energy, and grad students into developing one perfect wearable that does it all, and actually makes running faster virtually effortless!”
BY FOREMAN T. MILE
Everyone knows a good pair of trail running shoes are practically essential for outdoor running. But if you’re thinking of taking those bad boys off after you leave the dirt behind, think again: More and more, runners everywhere are wearing their trail shoes to work. (Now that’s one “rat race” I can get behind!) In this article, I take a look at a few new trail running shoes to see how our wear testers thought each pair performed in a corporate office setting. Continue reading
Last week we hit you up with some of the greatest upcoming autumn races. Well, fall is also bringing it in the product category as well! Check out our reviews of some of the most anticipated gear of the new season!
Trail Runner’s Fern Fronds
When nature calls and you’re deep in the backcountry, don’t get caught with your pants down! These handy and hygienic prepackaged fern fronds are perfect for trail runners who actually don’t want a burr up their ass!
Also available in Poo-Poo Poplar, Big-Ass Big-Leaf Maple, and, of course, Dry-As-A-Desert Succulent. $19.99 from REI.com. Import
Trail Runner’s Fern Fronds
Penis Sling with Stick
For the minimalist runner who has it all, this Penis Sling with Stick pairs perfectly with toe socks! Run the way nature intended with this one-size-fits-all piece of rope that you tie around your moneymaker to hold it up and keep it from flopping around as you run with a stick, just like the hunter-gatherers of old! And since it’s 100% twine, you can be sure its wickability is second-to-none. The included manual describes in easy-to-understand detail 27 different holds, so purist runners of every shape and size can cruise the trails or city streets in absolute comfort. Plus, no more untimely turtling! 100% money-back guarantee for the lifetime of the stick.
Sling with Stick
And you gals may or may not have a penis to wrangle, but now you too can run ultra-minimalist style even during “that time of the month”! Choose between pine or floral scent. $180 from Amazon Prime. Imported from Kenya.
With products like these, we’ve got just one question: Has there ever been a better time to be a trail runner? Stay tuned for more great product reviews from The Heel Strike! And, as always, hit us up in the comments with your questions and comments about this run-tastic new gear!